Thank Buddha it's Friday.

And I have a 3 day weekend.  And I only work 4 days next week!

Party on.

Sitting at home right now watching "The Runaways".  Last night I fell asleep at 9pm (on the couch), stayed there until 8am and still yawned my face off all day.  What gives?  It is currently 12:59am.

I don't know if it's the medication or not.  I thought the excessive yawning had stopped but I also thought it was starting to make me feel a bit better and now I'm not so sure about any of it.  Should I be taking a higher dosage?  I'm currently on 10mg of Cipralex.  I wonder how much other people are taking and what sort of success they've had....

I've wanted to write about the fact that I am no longer smoking pot. I'm not sure who's reading this (if anyone) or what they might think of smoking weed but I live in Vancouver, B.C otherwise known as the Amsterdam of North America and it's pretty commonplace.  Even though almost it's no big deal to smoke a joint or a bowl, I've been in a very long term relationship with the ganja and like any other long term relationship I've had, it ran it's course.  The love is lost. 

Where I used to find comfort and peace, I started to find anxiety and paranoia. That's a mood killer for sure.  Over the years that I spent locked away in my apartment I found it easier to block out the world when I got stoned but all of a sudden that changed.  It turned on me.  Friends off. 

During that time I would occassionally think that if I did quit smoking everything would somehow get better. I'd be more inclined to leave the house or something.  Not really the case.  Not at all.

Don't really feel like writing anymore.  Actually considering deleting this post but....fuck it.

~Marly